Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
