You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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