She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
