i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Randomize
