I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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