): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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