I think I died a long time ago.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Also, beer. Big fan.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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