If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
