So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
