why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
