just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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