thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
