I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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