Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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