one might say we're banned from that church
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Randomize
