Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize