Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
