Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
