i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
operation harelip BJ is a go
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
