Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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