So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I believe in your delicious
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
