I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
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