Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
