i think i have herpe
just one?
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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