garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
