Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
too bad you live with your parents still
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize