there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I am in a vortex of obligation.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
