Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Randomize
