I wish I could punch you in the face.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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