And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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