dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
