her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize