garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
