I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Randomize
