47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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