I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize