And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
