Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
