physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize