I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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