I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
