Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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