your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
