Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
