he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Randomize
