bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
