he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
