I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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