I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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