You don't have asthma, your pregnant
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
