There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
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